Acting Origins: MLK Jr.

Acting Origins: MLK Jr.

I began my acting career playing a coat rack. When I showed up in her life, my second grade teacher, Mrs. Gardner, had long given up on actually teaching. She constantly looked surprised to find herself in a classroom. She mostly was interested in maintaining her bee hive, white jeans and Delorean. What a sight. […]

My Hair

My Hair

Yesterday a homeless man approached me and said, “Wow, I thought you were a guy, and then I saw that thing in your hair.” Then he asked me for some change. I was wearing a dress and a headband. He really needs to work on his pitch. What’s worse is I’m in the long laborious […]

Call Your Mom

Call Your Mom

When I do something bad-like ruin my appetite before dinner by eating cereal-I call my mother. “Hi, Mom. Just wanted to tell you that I spoiled my appetite with cereal. Ok. Talk to you later.”

Kidnapped

Kidnapped

As a child I was certain I would be kidnapped. I made both my parents, not just one, walk me to school. I locked my windows and door before bed. But I had a hard time sleeping. After all, we had a swing set in the front yard, a tell-tale sign any good kidnapper would […]

DomestiCATing and Other CATastrophes, Part II

DomestiCATing and Other CATastrophes, Part II

Besides naming our kitten Youngblood, we haven’t noticeably damaged him. Yes, that’s his name, although I voted for John or Arnold–I love a boring human name on a feline. But a name like Youngblood creates so many more opportunities for our kitten and his companions. For instance, Noah likes calling the vet just to ask questions about “My cat, Youngblood,” so he can listen to the receptionist snicker.