The First Annual Meeting of Adult Only Children

The First Annual Meeting of Adult Only Children

Thank you all so much for coming to the first Annual Meeting of Adult Only Children! Ok, stop looking at your phones. Excuse me?! I’m speaking. I wrote this speech and it’s very important to me! Thank you. So I decided to found this organization by myself because as I’m sure you are all aware, […]

Dear Nancy Drew

Dear Nancy Drew

Oh Nancy, you taught me how to read, and you were ever so brave. In hindsight, your complete disregard of danger seemed to stem from a firm belief that no one would ever hurt a lady. And you were such a lady. Everything was matchy, matchy with you – hand bags and shoes and lots […]

My Top Mundane Moments of 2014

My Top Mundane Moments of 2014

Our sink leaked for most of November 2014. Every morning I’d watch toothpaste saliva drip out of the plumbing and into a bowl we placed under the sink for just such a purpose. I threw everything I couldn’t handle organizing into a desk drawer. Later I would find several lavender sample lotion packets at the […]

10 Tips for the Holidays

10 Tips for the Holidays

Get it together already. Thanksgiving is practically here, and beyond us is that booze and butter marathon ominously called “the holidays.” We do this every year, people, but some of us still struggle to excel. So, I’m going to help you out.

Nobody Cares About Your Workout

Nobody Cares About Your Workout

I don’t want to hear about your workout. It will just make me insecure. But I do want you to listen to me talk about my workout. Do you know that I’ve started doing Pilates? This happened because the Yoga studio near my house turned out to be the chanting only kind. The teacher mysteriously wore […]

Something’s Off at Anthro

Something’s Off at Anthro

Someone at Anthropologie got tired of the girly aprons and scented candles and crossed over to the dark side. Is it a cry for help? At least the prices are on brand. Red Beast Hat Stand, $514.95Is it a hat or scalp?   Stag Head, $1899.95 (was $3,800.00). For the serial killer look. Woolen Finger Puppets, […]