My Top Mundane Moments of 2014
Our sink leaked for most of November 2014. Every morning I’d watch toothpaste saliva drip out of the plumbing and into a bowl we placed under the sink for just such a purpose.
I threw everything I couldn’t handle organizing into a desk drawer. Later I would find several lavender sample lotion packets at the bottom of the drawer.
I drank a lot of Diet Coke and even more sparkling water and worried that maybe I was getting Osteoporosis? Also, the fungus under my thumb didn’t go away.
My dentist confirmed I’m not flossing enough.
I bought a jean dress at a used clothing store. I thought it was sort of a mod, baby doll dress. It upset everyone in my life–parents, friends and boyfriend. Apparently I looked like I was wearing a sandwich board, advertising my own unattractiveness. I sold it back to the clothing store where I bought it.
The TV show “Death Comes to Pemberly” combined my two favorite things – “Pride and Prejudice” and a murder mystery, but it failed to do either justice and was a big fat disappointment.
I almost failed my DMV vision test, so I went to the optometrist, who promptly gave me glasses. Everyday I can see less and less in the distance, but my glasses are adorable, and maybe I don’t want to see what’s coming at me.
My boyfriend read the entire “Harry Potter” series and only talked in Potter jargon. Potter and I never got along. I’m a snob and didn’t like the writing. His Potter mania passed in October 2014 just in time to keep me from buying him a wand for Christmas.
In the summer of 2014, I was stuck in Hollywood Bowl traffic every night while driving home from work.
I never wanted to work out.
I started drinking coffee, but only with 1/4 cup of cream and two Stevias.
I started keeping the “Bridget Jones Edge of Reason Soundtrack” in my car, just for the questions it would inspire and because I got the CD for free.
I also learned to always keep honey roasted peanuts on my person. You never know when you might be stuck in traffic and need a snack.
I accidentally spent $12 on ribbon at Paper Source, and I was too embarrassed and lazy to return it.
I developed a mania for clothes with animals on them – bunnies, horses, insects, anything but crabs. I saw a blouse at H&M with a crab pattern, and it just seemed like setting yourself up for a bad joke.
I kept an orchid alive. It hasn’t flowered yet.